A frog, a scorpion, and a philosopher walk into a bar. The philosopher orders a drink, and the frog and scorpion start arguing.
"What's the difference between you and me?" asks the frog.
"We both carry our own burdens," replies the scorpion, "but mine is the weight of my inevitable self-destruction."
The philosopher chimes in, "Ah, the duality of existence, forever entwined in an endless dance of amphibian and arachnid metaphysics."
What happens next is an exercise for the most attentive of readers.