A jumping spider pretending she is not a spider walks into a bar.

"Excuse me," says pretending-not-to-be-a-spider, "Do you have any soft vegetables here?"

"We have many soft vegetables for you here, madam," says the bartender. "I'm sure one of them would be right up your alley."

"Thank you so much," says the spider. "You are very kind."

The spider sits down and immediately bursts into tears. "I hate soft vegetables," she says.